Stop Waiting For The Light At The End Of The Tunnel

They say good things come to those who wait.

Well damn it, I'm done waiting!

This is the danger of setting widely ambitious goals.

They’re sexy, they’re invigorating, they bring great change to the world.

But, when your vision is this grand, there will be long periods of “little success”.

There will be long periods of “waiting”, long periods of monotonously chopping wood, carrying water, and feeling like you haven’t caught a “win” in ages.

They call it the “process” (And boy how they love that word)

But here’s what they don’t tell you.

The “process” is a LONG HAUL, and at many points, the “goal” you’ve set for yourself is going to feel so far out of the picture you’ll have absolutely no chance of “seeing the light at the end of the tunnel”.

Sometimes it’s even hard to imagine the tunnel ever ending!

If you’re not careful, this absence of foreseeable future can get you turned around, lost, and sometimes even deciding it’s time to give up and quit pursuing the goal.

So here’s what I propose.

Don’t wait until you can see the light at the end of the tunnel, instead, manufacture your own light, right now.

Here’s what I mean.

1) Manufacture your own light

If you have a big, lofty goal, what are the 10 smaller things that need to happen first?

And what 10, even smaller things, need to happen in order to make those happen? (confused yet?)

Point is - write your smallest steps down, and start working towards those.

They’re completion will lead you in the direction of your larger picture goal and they’ll break down the length of the tunnel!

Example, for weeks I was trying to get myself back in the habit of running in the morning.

But I couldn’t do it.

6am felt like a special version of hell waiting just for me.

So instead of focusing on “going for a run” I started focusing on “putting my feet on the floor when my alarm went off.”

This was the mini step!

Much smaller, almost embarrassing sounding, BUT, it made all the difference!

2) Don’t celebrate the “small wins”. Celebrate the energy and effort you invested to make the small wins happen.

As you set these smaller benchmarks, don’t just pass them in a hurry to reach the next, instead, as you hit these smaller benchmarks, take a moment to celebrate.

But wait, let’s define celebrate.

Celebrate doesn’t mean fool yourself into thinking the race is won, oh no my friend, that was simply the first lap.

What it does mean is that even to complete that first lap, it took dedication, discipline, and decision making.

To “celebrate” means to honor those skills, choices, and efforts!

It doesn't have to be long or robust, but make it count.

Give yourself a pat on the back, say some kind words, get yourself a damn ice cream cone. (if it aligns with your goals that is haha)

Point is, along the way, give yourself some credit even for the “small” things.

You’re doing something the majority of the world will never imagine.

3) Document your journey, the ups, and the downs.

As a coach I’ve had the opportunity to work with folks aged 4 - 84.

That’s a big spread, and it means I’ve had the chance to hear all sorts of life experiences.

The most striking however is when I sit with people at the older end of this spectrum, especially those who have been “successful” in life. (define that as you wish)

As we look back, and reflect on their long career, one big ol’ red flag almost always comes up - they can’t remember any of the wins along the way, in fact, they often don’t remember much of anything along the way!

They were so busy sprinting with blinders on, they never looked around.

Now they sit with all the “success”, they bask in the light at the end of the tunnel, but sadly they have no idea how they really got there.

The meaning, the juice of life, the richness, was bypassed.

Worst part is, you can’t get those moments back.

I’ve learned when it comes to life, it’s not about the grand reveal at the end. That’s the cheap stuff.

It’s about the up’s and downs, the good and the bad along the way.

Don’t miss those.

Keep a log, write things down, take pictures, reflect with peers - stay connected to these moments, for these are the moments that truly give life meaning.

You’ve Arrived

Frankly, I’m all hyped up at this point, so let’s get started with this right now.

If you’ve read this far (fingers cross you have) reply to this email and let me know where you’re at within the tunnel?

Just starting out on a goal? Deep within? Almost to the light at the end?

Don’t walk that journey alone!

Let me know where you’re at, and let’s make the journey together!